This Makes Me A Little Nervous
May27

This Makes Me A Little Nervous

Last night I got home and was completely exhausted, wanting to X myself across my new queen bed while my singleness remains for an unknown period of time. It’s a bittersweet feeling but you know exactly what I’m talking about. Standard protocol upon arrival is to leave a trail of clothing, front door to bedroom. It begins by the loosening my belt, unbuckling my pants, and letting gravity take over while I pull my shirt off. While my...

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A Good Mom Doesn’t Give Up
May08

A Good Mom Doesn’t Give Up

I was in family law court years ago for a custody issue, waiting quietly behind two parents that were on stage and on display. The dad sat next to an attorney that looked like he haphazardly threw his suit on, while having one of those mornings when you get lucky with the bedhead. The attorney was obviously disorganized, searching through an open file while the proceedings are taking place. I’ve seen this situation before. Dad did...

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I Hope You’re Happy!
Oct20

I Hope You’re Happy!

Every October 20th for the past six years has been a somber day for me. The seasonal changes remind me of how I felt back then; the chillier mornings, the wet grounds, the scattered leaves, and the increase of wind activity, it all reflects on a time of feeling empty and hopeless. My life had a dramatic turn in a new direction this day, where my daily activities as a dad would be stripped because of my own choices. I had lost custody...

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A Moment of Time
Oct26

A Moment of Time

Shock and surprise, in the blink of an eye. I’m still a kid myself! This twenty year old guy. Being a father to another human being, living a simple life of wiping and cleaning. Every other weekend she’d spend with her mom. I was a full-time dad, a damn lucky one. Definitely scared, not sure what to do. I got the hang of it as day one turned to day two. Friends are going out to celebrate a birth. I’m staying in tonight to change more...

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The Now That Faces Me
Jul17

The Now That Faces Me

It was Thursday, November 17, 2011 at 11:36pm.  I had just posted to Facebook, “Good god I am so sad and can’t call on anyone.”  The comments to follow from friends and family were filled with God, love, and hope.  I didn’t give a fuck, especially about God.  I felt like his whole goal in life was to fail me.  And now, all of a sudden, I have friends that care?  Bullshit.  They like the drama.  I’m a good provider of that.  I was...

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